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Preserve marriage: Attack the problem, not the person
When you disagree with her husband, using a statement beginning with "You" (like "You never understand me", or "You always want to win themselves") will only increase your stress levels both. Which will be heard by the husband was "You, you, you", and this will cause anger, self defense, and a greater separation. Talking about the problem, and use statements that begin with "I" to describe how you feel when that happens, suggests Dr. Scott Haltzman, MD, author of The Secrets of Happy Families. It would be better if you also put it more gently.
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